So my baby brother and I are living together now–he’s a sophomore in college and I’m a grad student–and I am stoked. He most probably is not. Except for the fact that I cook and he can eat real meals for a change. That is, when he actually stays here. He’s been here for almost two weeks and has spent most of his nights elsewhere–I think he’s passed out in his own bed thrice now. Note that my brother is really shy and keeps to himself. Doesn’t believe in small talk. Unless it’s about white trash. He finds white trash hilarious. And so, based on essentially nothing, I jump to the conclusion (well, just one of many theories, rather) that he is too awkward to get a girl and that he’s gay. And since exploring sexuality openly in our family would be preposterous, I assume that this is what his awkwardness stems from–not being able to be himself around his family and instead choosing to be distant and callous. Too bad he’s probably just another awkward 19 year old boy. And my detective skills probably need to be honed. Or do they?
me: so whose place are you passing out at?
baby brother: jay’s
me: is that your boyfriend?
baby brother: haha what? no. i’m not gay
me: man, why you always passin’ out there?
baby brother: dude, we just watch “trailer park boys” and YouTube vids and then just pass out
me: alright…just checking
I am soo smooth. I then proceeded to race my brother to his friend’s car parked in front of our apartment. I was going to meet his friends whether he wanted me to or not. I ignored his “Maaan, that’s awkward. Wait.” And the fact that he was calling his friend in the car to warn him about the crazy sister. Honestly? His fault for thinking he could live with his big sister at college and just do as he pleased without me questioning him. Our parents always ask me where he is! Besides, I’m a nosy older sister vying for my awkward 19 year old brother’s affections and trust and friendship and all that jazz. Is it too much to want to know my own brother’s life story?? I think not. Can he know mine? Absolutely not.
But seriously, I am waiting for the day when (not if) we can talk about our respective relationships and I can bitch about the male species and tell him he better not be like that with his girlfriend. I smile at the thought.
Okay, so at this point, I’m pretty sure he’s not gay. My brother can’t lie to my face without looking guilty/constipated.
I’m so pleased with the fact that I just dove into his life like that. Yes, these moments just transpired. And he took it all in good humor–or at least laughed hesitantly and didn’t get angry.
Pleased indeed. A good day for our relationship. Met two of his friends and discovered his sexual orientation. Awesome.