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lemme get in on that

Anonymous blogging at Wheatish will hereby be published under the username Anaanimous. Cheers!

Sheltered and naive, I dated the first asshole who showed interest in me. Years later I was finally able to cut the cord. Thought I grew up.

Then I turned the corner and fell in love so deeply and desperately that there was no way I acted a day over 13. Two years in and he still gave me the butterflies. There wasn’t a man on earth that I would have rather had. I woke up each morning with a smile on my face.

And then he broke my heart.

And then I grew up some more.

We tell ourselves we’re young and awesome and all will work out fabulously but there’s always that scary little voice whispering the contrary.

Can I really have an awesome career and marry my best friend and have babies and live happily ever after? I’m not sure.

Do I have dreams and ambitions? Yes. But deep down am I just a big baby that wants no more than food and shit tons of affection? Holy shit. Maybe…

Is that wrong? Right. I’m ambitious, spirited, and ready to do big things. Who needs love? If it happens it happens. Right? Right. No sense in freaking out about the unknown and the unpredictable. Maybe I’m not hot shit. But at least I know I’ve got brains. School school school. Focus on that. Okay. Sigh.